wouldn't it be hilarious if you were about to take an international flight and your passport was expired?

why, yes. yes it would be.

wait.

no it wouldn't.

good news is that i have long legs.

. . .

boxes hold shit that you need and probably don't need and both.

they say that moving is one of the top 5 most stressful things one can ever go through.

they say that if you're moving in manhattan, it becomes a top 3 life stresser of all time.

they (whoever they are) are right in ways that i had completely and regrettably forgotten about.

while i technically "moved" weeks ago, "moving" really only meant bringing an air mattress and a suitcase along and leaving the rest behind to deal with later.

later quickly turned into now and i am subsequently living inside this photo.

i wholeheartedly believe that the only way i'm even able to get to the bathroom is because of 15 years of ballet training.

i am taking this flexibility thing to an entirely new level and learning to hold my bladder for far longer stretches than i imagine is remotely healthy.

oh and when it is suggested to you, at two o'clock in the morning, that "doing something awesome" means building a giant three-thousand-pound wardrobe that you purchased at the beloved ikea . . .

it is not awesome.

hilarious and completely stupid, yes.

awesome is debatable.

boys get these ideas of lunacy in the middle of the night because they think they are superhero superpower macho craftsmen ninjas.

when really, they are just batshit crazy.

thank god for 24-hour corner bodegas that sell beer by the truckload.

thank god for that . . .

moving plus working around the clock plus a few other things.

equals.

SO MUCH TO SAY.

(!!!!!!!)

tomorrow.

tomorrow will be the day.

this is where we are. this is who we are.

[i’m digging the blue tile.]

you’re giving times square a run for her money.

and god knows, there’s nothing worse than times square in the summer.

and often in the winter, too.

110th street stop: glad to know you.

the second round of this.

well, that was weird.

unexpected spacehog appearance at the brooklyn bowl.

where we went to eat because it was across the street and has rock ‘n roll fries.

and because we can get in with no hassle.

friends in high places.

[my fiends are so so connected. or just own great joints. or both.]

it brought it all full circle and left me with my jaw on the floor.

it’s like they can read my mind.

two point five hours of straight up inspiration. even of the home decor kind.

edward sharpe and the magnetic zeros.

last night.

at the roseland.

KILLED IT.

killed it.

if you haven’t seen them live, run.

do not walk.

but you can skip.

‘cause they are a skippy kind of bunch.

and you guys, THIS.

is going in my bedroom.

it’s happening.

or a smaller, less global-size version of it.

china ball lights are sex pot.

i fumbled with how i would rig it and then i realized one of my best friends is an interior designer and rigs shit for a living.

good shit.

like the china ball light that will be going in my bedroom.

it’s your word to God’s ear. and everything else will just have to be.

east harlem is an oasis of purity.

[um, what?!]

just as long as you understand that it’s not greenwich village.

[well. um. duh.]

and so long as you don’t wander past the jefferson projects at night.

[huh? that’s 2 blocks away! and for 5 months out of the year, “night” begins at like four o’clock!!]

and don’t wear any jewelry.

[hang on. i’m a girl. come again??]

just keep your wits about you.

[okay, done. check. i’ve lived in these parts for long enough to know even that.]

 

i will say this about it, though . . .

it’s about as authentic as they come.

[and i like love that.]

and not riddled with the yuppie imports of select neighborhoods which will remain unmentioned.

[who has time for that anyway? oh wait. i’m an import. scratch the import bit.]

it’s as raw as the infection once was that sent me to the emergency room.

[which was well over a month ago. meh. moving on.]

he tells me there’s a cuban joint on the next block with great food.

[i can do cuban food.]

the fire department is within spitting distance.

[ya know. in case i want to set something on fire.]

and the bar next door is hailed as the dive of all dives. and only plays country music.

[okay, this will work. i can tap into my southern roots while getting knee-knocking drunk on the cheap at the same time. two birds. one stone.]

 

i can promise you absolutely nothing except this . . .

i will rock it.

[one way or another. and possibly multiple ways. yes. multiple ways.]