an unstoppable plug.

the 30:30:30 gig (officially titled “The Unstoppable Tour”) has exited the grueling post-production process and has finally been brought to air. i haven’t stopped by ESPN that much (or at all) this week, but i’m told it’s been all over the place. it is also being uploaded online, one episode per day, and can been seen at:

The Unstoppable Tour

truth be told, as light and airy as the episodes are in actuality, watching them (for me) is a teensy bit heavy. the good kind of heavy, but heavy nonetheless.

and this isn’t really all that surprising. trust me. this is a feeling i’ve grown quite familiar with over the years of pouring my soul into something, seeing it come to fruition, being incredibly proud of it, having it change a small (or big) piece of me, and then realizing it was so very good . . . but it’s over. sort of like watching home videos from your favorite vacation ever and then realizing you aren’t there anymore but you’d really like to be.

the end of some jobs are difficult. for one reason or another. i sat in my car and cried my eyes out the day i had to put my final wrap on Half Nelson. it was the most perfect job i’d had up to that point and it had set a bar that i feared my way-too-young career would never reach again. and it scared me. had i already tapped out in my early 20s???

this one was different. there aren’t words for the amount of uninhibited exploration and soul searching that was done in those 35 days. it was probably similar to the experience of hiking the Appalachian Trail, solo, but better. and there are likely only a couple of people who even have the vaguest idea of what i’m talking about. and really maybe only one.

i walk away from a lot of productions and disconnect from them in the amount of time it takes for me to pay the parking attendant who’s been watching over my car for the previous 16 hours.

[or driving it around the city. i know they do that. like the time i got in my car and the stereo was blaring a latin station i didn’t even know existed and my air conditioning was set on level 6, out of 5 . . . there’s a reason they ask you how long you’re leaving your car in their care as they hand you the ticket and hope you don’t come back so much as a half hour before you said you would.]

but then there are the jobs that sit in my chest for a little while.

like this one.

and i know i am better for them. and smarter. braver. more creative. a better negotiator. a better schmoozer. a faster thinker. but always, always, wanting just a little bit more . . .

[or a lot more. let’s be honest here.]

that is the unspoken curse of working in an industry that is a constant revolving door of the unexpected. matched with a girl who does everything with her heart and is sometimes nostalgic to a fault. but how can i not be, when standing on those very high peaks that sam is standing on in the photo above becomes a part of my responsibility? how can i not think back to the very day i was there, the things i was thinking, the moments i was living, and not have it weigh a little heavy on my chest? i would be crazy. and i would be wrong for this job.

i lead with my heart in absolutely everything that i do.

and these 35 days – and all that took place inside of them – was no exception.